The Hallway

Have you ever found yourself in a hallway of life? You know... that place in the middle... the waiting game.. a door has closed behind you and you are waiting for the next one to open. Yeah, I've been there quite a bit.

The thing about hallways is that.. they can be boring. There isn't much to them. Just a path that leads to other places. Doors on the right. Doors on the left. Each one offers some bit of hope of something better than the boring, long, skinny, seemingly lifeless hallway. But they can also be safe and comfortable. You know what to expect in a hallway and there are no surprises.

There have been times that I've tried to turn around and reopen a door that just closed. Because what I had before seems better than what's in front of me. But once a door has shut, it typically won't open again. I've knocked on other doors that seem exciting but they wouldn't open. I've pushed, I've shoved, I've picked at locks... I've cried and bargained with God.. but there are some doors in the hallway that just aren't meant for me.

Then there are the doors that seem to open on their own that I don't want to walk through. Inside these doors are pain, and very hard trials. Its probably the biggest chance for growth, but it's not the way I really want to grow. Once again I would rather stay in that safe hallway, or reopen the last door. I don't want this new door. But doors like this pull me in no matter how hard I try to fight against them.

Then there are a few, just a few doors that have opened for me with a lot of hard work and effort. It may have taken a while, but eventually they opened.

Occasionally, a door has even opened on its own in its own way. A door I didn't see coming. And inside were blessings that fell into place. Those are good doors.

But sometimes... you have to wait in the hallway for a while. And let me tell you, that can be hard.

The hallway can bring about feelings of boredom, discontentment, impatience, envy and jealousy. Enough time spent stuck in a hallway can make you feel like the walls are closing in around you.

But I have also found that for me, it's time spent in the hallway of life that brings about my greatest insecurities and anxieties. Can I really move forward toward the next door? What if inside brings pain? Am I capable of handling what might be in front of me? Maybe it's too much responsibility.

It's like this great contradiction of feeling discontent and wanting to move forward to something better- and at the same time thinking maybe I'm safer without stepping into that next doorway of unknown territory.

But I'm trying to remember the blessings that come about in the hallway. With no doors open, there is time to reflect, pray, and ask for God's counsel. There is time to slow down and build up your patience, faith in His plan. There's a sort of child-like trust that you have to have in order to wait for the right door of opportunity without being scared or insecure. Just content to find the door that He has planned for you.

You see... our feelings of discontentment when we are stuck in a season of waiting can help us realize our need for patience. The feeling of jealousy when doors open for others that we want for ourselves can serve to remind us that no two people have the same story... and we can and must learn to be content with that, no matter how unfair it may seem.

And if we are feeling scared, insecurities in the hallway of what might come next is an opportunity to live out the truth in that childhood song, "He's got the whole world in His hands."

Oh, to truly know that "He's got this!"

Slowly but surely God is teaching me to see these blessings. Sometimes I'm a slow learner, but He is a patient Father.

Looking back, I can see His guidance on which doors He closed and which ones He had me walk through.... so looking forward, I must trust that He knows what He is doing.. and in His own time and way, He will lead me to the next phase and out of the Hallway. He has the answers my soul is seeking. The why, when, and how. But until then, no matter what feelings may come, I can choose to have an attitude of praise.

The Other Side

Have you ever been through something so traumatic, so hurtful, so painful that you thought you'd never smile again?

I think a lot of us probably have.

I have had conversations with others where we all agreed.... when going through a hard trial of life, nothing seems to fill you with joy as it once could.

There have been times in my life of absolute happiness. Even when bad days would come and go, I was happy.

And then there have been times where nothing could really make me smile. I was in a season of mourning.

Is this not the normal ebb and flow of life? Ecclesasties talks about the seasons of life and how there are times of sadness and times of triumph. For whatever reason, that simple truth was very hard to grasp for me as a young adult.

Sometimes when bad things happen, we tend to think nothing good will ever happen again. But of course, that is just not true.

This blog is meant to encourage the overcomer spirit in us all, but because of the nature of it, most of my posts have some sort of negativity in them. They are mostly centered around trials and how to make it through them, always growing with the pain. Probably because that's what I needed. I needed perspective while going through the different seasons that helped me see God's work in all of it.

But there is also joy in overcoming. And if we can be honest about our problems, we should be able to be honest about our successes. You see, every mountain you have to climb has another side once you get to the top. Sometimes it's so hard to see that because our mountains are so large. There is much trouble and strife in the climb. But where there's an uphill battle there is a downhill slide.

And the other side is filled with blessings that were once hard to fathom.

Some of those blessings come in the form of achieving something you worked hard for.. like a medical coding certification.

Or spending spring break with your kids at the Houston Rodeo because you actually have time off work for a change. ☺

And then there is Easter Sunday, spent worshiping God with your kids in their Sunday best..

And so many more blessings that shouldn't be shared in a public way. 😉

So I just want to encourage you today to see the blessings in the storm... And know that on the other side there will be moments of pure joy again.

I'm happily in a season of life right now where the dark cloud has lifted and I'm viewing the rainbow.

But you may still be in the rain. And so I say, keep walking. Keep growing. Keep climbing. His goodness and mercy will follow you through it all.

Keep the faith. Keep overcoming.
-Mel