Autumn

And suddenly, there is change in the air. The winds pick up, the leaves turn colors. Something is happening. The temperature drops, the boots come out, and the sun disappears behind foggy clouds.

No more shorts and flip flops. No more sunshine and pool parties. Change is in the air.

Down in the Houston, TX area, Autumn doesn't follow a calendar. It comes and goes when it pleases. Some days it's here, and then it leaves and let's Summer return for a couple days before it suddenly makes another appearance.

Sometimes the temperature drop is a welcome change. Pulling out your fall sweaters and getting ready for the holidays... Autumn can be exciting.

But sometimes the lack of sunshine, the cold rain and crisp wind can be an unwelcome change. You are stuck indoors. Your immune system suffers and you end up with one cold after another. Sometimes change is bad.

Are you in an Autumn season of life? Are you experiencing the Houston version of Fall, where change just keeps coming? Back and forth. Back and forth. Sometimes good change. Sometimes bad change.

Pardon me for sounding like a Dr. Seuss book here, but sometimes that's how life feels. There is so much tossing to and fro.

I don't know many people that really like change. I mean, we enjoy our comfort zones. Our routines. Our normal. At the very least, we don't like negative changes.

One day you're just working and it's a normal day. The next, you're figuring out how you can help the family of a coworker who passed away. Suddenly, there is change in the air.

One day you're enjoying the beach and the waves with family and friends, and you blink and that weekend you are planning a funeral for your mom. Change.

If you are feeling these winds, rest assured you are not alone. We each face times in our lives where our normal disappears and a new normal comes in it's place. Just like the rain in early fall brings about cooler temperatures that remind you winter is coming.

Sometimes our Autumn winds of life are there to warn us that hard times may be coming.

So how do we not only survive the changes, but thrive in them?

Autumn is a season of preparing for what's coming. The trees prepare for winter by "shutting" down in a sense, which causes the leaves to change colors and fall off the branches. Birds get ready to migrate to warmer temperatures. Other animals gather food for the coming months.

God put all of it in motion. And our lives resemble this very thing from time to time. If He created it this way, then He is the one that can get you through it. Maybe the change in your life is His way of preparing you for some hard times coming up... and more importantly, the Spring time that will follow.

I know that's been the case for me. If I told you my story, it would be one of ups and downs and God in the midst of it holding me close and teaching me hard lessons I needed to learn in order to move forward with the next season of life. He has a way of doing that, you know? Using what may be painful experiences of ours to help prepare us for an opportunity in the future.

If you are feeling the crisp, cool air of change, rest assured that Winter won't last forever. Spring will come again.

When you feel Rejected

I tried so hard to be "on." I tried to fit into the conversations around me. I wanted to be charming and sweet; someone that people wanted to be around. But no matter what, I just didn't seem to be able to insert myself into the conversation. Call it "shyness" or "introverted." Call it what you like. This situation and these people were not into me.

I know what it feels like to be left out. I know what it's like to be rejected by others.

I like to tease my friends and family about my middle child syndrome where I claim to have been constantly overlooked and unheard as a child.

But in all seriousness, sometimes even as adults we face times of rejection by others.

There was one situation in particular where I felt this way. Everyone was nice. Everyone was pleasant. But I just didn't fit in with the crowd of people I was with. As they reminisced about fun times I wasn't included in, and planned their next outing that again didn't include me, I couldn't help but feel rejected. In that moment, I felt as if it was me somehow. I wasn't good enough in their eyes to hang with them.

I think as we get older we begin to realize who "our people" are. And it makes it much easier when others don't find us as charming as we actually are.

But sometimes it's something more serious that is heart breaking and soul damaging. Sometimes we face real, deep, painful rejection.

So how do we overcome these feelings? How do we "move on" when it continually creeps up in our life and heart?

The other day a passage in Isaiah stuck out to me as I read it.

He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. 

Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God and afflicted. 

But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed. - Isaiah 53:3-5

When I read this passage some things just jumped out at me that proved to be profound to my heart.

Not because they are super deep, spiritual truths, but actually quite opposite. Sometimes for me, the simplest bible truths have the hardest time sinking deep into my soul. Maybe it's because these truths are easy to forget when I am feeling down, or because the enemy tries very hard to steal these truths from my heart.

1: Jesus knows the feeling of rejection.

There it is, plain as day in scripture. He was rejected by men. Men hid their faces from Him. We really can bring those feelings and situations to Him when we go through them. He understands the pain in our heart. How often have I forgotten to take my burden to Him, and instead sat around drowning in my own feelings of insecurity? Why do I sometimes take other peoples opinions of me and stamp them to my forehead as if they are true? Sure, I may not be this person's favorite, or I may have poured out love to someone who didn't appreciate what I was trying to give.. or my personality may clash with someone and we just will never be anything but civil to each other.. But that doesn't determine ANYTHING about my worth. After all, if anyone who has ever lived had great worth.. it's Christ. And he was rejected too.

2: He carried our grief and sorrow to the cross.

There is no need for self pity. That grief and sorrow has already been dealt with in love. He went through it for us, so we could release those feelings to Him. That pain can be taken from us, and true acceptance and value is given in return. He gives us our worth because of the cross. So, the next time we feel rejected by someone, we can give it to Jesus and let Him take it to the cross. Let Him show us His thoughts about us. He values us so much that He went through all He did just to give us a chance to be with Him. Through His wounds on the cross, we are healed; healed from sin, healed from shame, healed from yes - the feeling of rejection.

Jesus offers more than just eternal salvation- as if that wasn't enough- He offers healing now. Oh what a beautiful thought!

If you are feeling lonely or dealing with the pain of rejection, I hope this passage gives you peace and comfort to know what your Savior has done for you. Read it again. Not only does he understand, but he went through it too, so that you could know his opinion of you - which is the only one that matters.

So, some practical advice from one person to the next?

Ask God to show you who He wants you to do life with. Ask Him to help you find "your people." He can and will lead you to Godly friends and influences who will see the worth you have in Christ and be there for you through all the good and bad times in life that may come. He can send influences that will help you become the best version of yourself that you can be. Within the fellowship of God's people, you will find where you "fit in." You will find that place where you belong. You'll find family that values you. Don't lose heart, my friend. You are loved.


-Mel